For Your Listening Enjoyment (music edition)

I can’t sit and listen to voices all day so there are music breaks in my new lifestyle as a professional driver who doesn’t get paid. Also, the children don’t listen to podcasts (unless you can think of some good kid ones) so we jam when they’re in the car.


Current favorites:


Oliver Boyd and the Remembralls: That’s right. Harry Potter themed rock music. I am a proud Ravenclaw, but my favorite song might be “Just a Hufflepuff.” YOU’RE WELCOME.


Lizzo. Because I am cool and young and hip, yeah? No? Well you might say Lizzo is not kid friendly and you would not be wrong but also, it’s body positive and has math (“What’s two plus two?” The song calls and, along with the music, they call, “FOUR! Three, Two, One!”)


I’m trying to bring back Queen Friday which is something we did when I drove carpool my senior year of high school in a Ford Taurus station wagon which held eight including two rear facing in the back. That car was great because it could fit the whole cast of Brighton Beach Memoirs. 

Musical of the Day: the kids are obsessed with Seussical but I’m trying to get them into others like Matilda, Into the Woods, Newsies, Annie, Peter Pan, etc. They also really like and know most of the words to “Waving Through a Window.”


Acoustic Covers: MAN do I love a good acoustic cover. The other covers that we have been enjoying are by Cinematic Pop which takes a pop song like “Friday, I’m in Love” and covers it in the style of a movie soundtrack. Epic.


Hamildrops: What are Hamildrops? https://www.hamildrops.com/ I have gotten in trouble with “The Benjamin Franklin Song” because, while she is learning about history, it’s probably not good that I caught my five year old drawing and singing to herself, “Do you know who the fuck I am? Do you know who the fuck I am? Do you know who the fuck I am? I am Benjamin Fucking Franklin!”


“New” Guys: Jukebox the Ghost, Bleachers, Taylor Swift (the blonde loves TSwift duh), Mika, Sara Bareilles, Lana Del Rey.


“Old” Guys: Beatles, ABBA, Cake, Dave Matthews, Joni Mitchell, Backstreet Boys, Barenaked Ladies, Wham!, Elton John.


Really old: Ella Fitzgerald, Billie Holiday, Nina Simone, Louis Armstrong.


WHAT ELSE? What do the children need in their musical education?

For Your Listening Enjoyment (Podcast Reviews)

I’ve been driving much more recently. Two kids at two schools, exercise in the suburbs, three different places where I teach, errands, therapy, etc. I drive at least an hour a day and it’s usually more like two. So I’ve upped my listening game.


Do you know what kind of learner you are? I am a kinesthetic, visual, musical learner. I learn by doing, seeing, and singing about it. Most of my SAT vocab knowledge came from Sondheim musicals. I am NOT auditory. I space the fffff out when people talk at me. So podcasts are hard. I don’t like the chit chat ones. I don’t like the side stories. I get lost in those. I’ve started the process of finding ones I like/don’t and will discuss them here. PLEASE comment with your suggestions for more and some that are kid friendly. I will do a follow up post on our music discoveries (Spoiler: Kids love Lizzo).


The Moth: Overall, this one works the best for me. There’s a short, concise narrative. It’s usually either funny or touching but not too depressing or topical. These serve me well on errand runs or while cooking.


Babysitter’s Club Club: I wanted to love this podcast where two dudes seriously discuss the children’s books but I couldn’t make it more than thirty minutes into the first one because HOLY TANGENT BATMAN. I could not follow the thread.


My Favorite Murder: TOOO MAAAAANY SIDE CONVOS! I wanted to love these ladies and I think I would have fun with them socially but, if you’re gonna tell me a story, tell me a story.


Queens of Adventure: drag queens play DnD. What could be better? I enjoyed this one but wouldn’t listen to it all the time because the narrative, like actual DnD is meandering and there are lots of side quests.


Dax Shepard’s Armchair Expert: I started with the Ben Platt one and it was very clear that Dax does not really care about Broadway (bc he said so) so this wasn’t a good starter. Then I tried a few more of people he has worked with and likes and they were better. Dax always sounds kinda bored with the people but I think that’s just his voice.


Conan O’Brien Needs Friend: I like Conan and his potential friends. Sometimes they talk about things that were funny but they don’t do the funny thing and I didn’t see it so I get bored but I overall like the discourse.


Show People: VERY specific: a dude talks with Broadway stars about being on Broadway. I love the ones of the people I’ve seen but I wouldn’t recommend it unless you LOVE Broadway.


My Little Tony’s: same vein--super SUPER specific discussion of Broadway seasons. It works for me when they discuss a year I went to NY and saw shows.


Creative Processing with Joseph Gordon Levitt: The one I listened to bored me to death because I had only seen one movie of the guy they were talking to but I like the IDEA of talking about the creative process with JGL. I will try one more.


LeVar Burton Reads: Delightful. When his voice first began, I had a sensory flashback to being a kid watching Reading Rainbow. I have only listened to one short story, called “Sea Girls.” One girl is a human and one girl is a mermaid. I loved it and I love hearing Geordi Laforge tell me stories again.










I NEED MORE...

But What Do You Do All Day? (School Edition)

Guess what? It finally happened. The girl has gone off to kindergarten. She's doing fine. I mean, she's exhausted and comes home with most of her lunch uneaten, but she's doing fine and has little cute friends and seems to enjoy it.

I was totally planning to write a saccharine post about how proud I am of my big baby and how ready she is and how much I cried (I didn't) and missed her (also didn't) ....but....instead..........howwww abouuuuut.....

ME!

If it wasn't stuck in your head then, it is now.

My classes don't start for a week and that's actually great because this has been really an adjustment for ME!

I maybe low key judged some moms who stay home after their kids go to school BUT NO MORE. I have been completely busy, y'all.

Here's my day, and maybe it looks like all other SAHM (learn the acronyms) days but also, I really, really want to go up to every mom in the kinder class and ask them what they did all day in a minute by minute break down because I'm desperately curious but I'm also trying to figure out exactly which ones are gonna be my friends for the next one to twelve years so I'm trying to play it coy at the moment.

6:40 Awake with the dawn/the cries of the boy who, every night before bed, says to me, "When I scream, it's time to get up!" He runs as loudly as possible for someone weighing under 40lbs into my room and then complains that I'm taking too long peeing.

6:45 I make his breakfast first because I don't have it in me to parent a three year old with a lesson on patience first thing. Then I make coffee and husband's, my, and the girl's breakfast in that order.

6:50 Before the coffee is done brewing, the boy is done eating and requests being changed into clothes that I have to psychically intuit to fit his whim and then becomes possessed by a demon unless I let him watch a show on the kindle and usually I haven't had coffee or food at this point and I let him so I can do all the other things.

7am wake the girl who is DEEPLY asleep and force her to pee and eat and then she asks me to "dress her like a baby" and wanders in to watch the show. Make lunches for all except me. Yes, they are in bento boxes. No they are not cutesy and containing sandwiches shaped like pandas.

7:10 Bye Husband. Everyone lightly acknowledges his departure. The boy asks for yogurt. I give the boy yogurt because #calcium

7:30 abandon any uneaten food/undranken coffee and throw on clothes. These last couple days I've tried to wear "real" clothes because, you know, I'm in the market for friends and maybe I should dress for them. You notice I didn't shower?

7:40 pry the kindle from their hands and brush and floss teeth (#dentistkids), put on shoes, and we leave.

7:50 I have to drive the girl to elementary school because she got into a "public focus option" which is liiiiike  public school in that it's free and unlike a public school in that there's no bus.

8:10 Arrive at school, unload children, brace for the sound of the bell that sets my sensory processing disordered kids into anxiety mode, and go to the classroom. Do the routine of filling water, hanging coats, etc. I could get to school later but I guarantee a good parking spot by getting there early and that's worth my time, I think.

8:30 The teacher opens the door and lets the girl in. The boy begins to cry because of a combo of "I want to go to kindergarten. I miss my sister! I want to stay and play! I don't want to go to this school! This school is too big! I don't want to go to my school! The bell is loud!" And I carry him out of there as the other parents give me sympathy smiles.  Drive the boy to preschool as he weeps.

8:45 Drop the boy at preschool. Everyone remarks on how dressed up I am. My standards are lower for the preschool crowd who has seen me through all disgusting trimesters of being pregnant with the boy, the post-surgical post-partum year, the year of tantrums of having a 1 and 3 year old, and every day since.

9am walk in the door of my SILENT HOUSE. Sprawl on the couch.

9:30 DO ALL THE THINGS.

- laundry
- groceries
- dishes
- food prep
- tidying
- "work" (social media for the dental practice, prep for said classes)
- READ A BOOK LIKE A HUMAN
- one day this week I went to breakfast with a friend and we were giddy with our freedom
- EXERCISE LIKE A HUMAN
- somehow there's more laundry and dishes already
- stretch
- go on the internet
- learn what podcasts are because.....

2:40 Get back in the car to go get the girl.  Listen to a podcast. Find it delightful. Maybe I am going to be okay driving 2 hours a day somehow to get these kids to and from school.

3pm Snag a good parking spot. Go to the girl's classroom sans screaming three year old. Pick up the exhausted limp noodle that is my daughter. Somehow this takes fifteen minutes.

3:15 Drive home. Get precious few details about her day.

3:30 Arrive home. Read with the girl. My favorite part of the day.

4:20 leave to get the boy from preschool. Lose the girl in the preschool playground because she misses her old life. Somehow this takes fifteen minutes

4:45 Arrive back home. Feed the feral beasts as fast as possible. Attempt to make grown-up dinner.

5pm ALL CHAOS DESCENDS UPON US. Everyone is tired, the food hasn't hit their systems yet, and it's ALL TOO MUCH!

6pm or whenever. Daddy's home! Somehow the dishwasher is going but there's a sink full of dishes and every toy and book in the house is on the floor and I've lost my shit and the girl is in timeout for trying to curb stomp her brother and the boy is dressed as Spiderman.

6:30 eat grown up dinner (because I give up on the whole "eat together thing") while the children play angelically in the next room. They play angelically when the next thing is:

7pm bedtime for the boy! Read the books, "tell a story about (insert random assortment of objects and people)", sing (he currently always wants "Til There Was You"), tuck in, and, as I leave, he whispers, "When I scream, it's time to get up!"

7:30 Read (or watch Dark Crystal) with the girl. Let her chill the F ouuuuut.

8:30 Alls quiet (except the girl's super loud audio book). Netflix and scroll on our phones.

10pm read in bed. Sleep?

TOMORROW WE DO IT ALL AGAIN!

We don't even have any extracurriculars at this point! And no appointments this week. And I didn't have to appear at work!

Did you want to know? I don't care. But what did you do all day? No really...did I do it right? Is this what we do all day?